The Beginning of Kate’s Story…

From the beginning of time I was told I was found under a rock. It was a joke of course, but one that perplexed me as a young child. However, as I grew into adulthood, I knew this was an impossibility to be birthed into a family in such a way…right? Well, since living in Uganda, crazier stories have held true. For instance, quite frequently we hear stories of newborns being found in trash dumps, pit latrines and even in a swamp. Such stories are tragic…heart-wrenching…and miraculous when the abandoned children actually survive.

Months ago, we received word of such a baby being found in a swamp. I remember my very first thought was “How could this be? What possessed this babies mother to do such a thing?” What was meant for bad, God turned into good. The following is one baby’s story of how she was rescued.

One day, some boys were walking by a swamp on their way to school and found a newborn baby girl, perhaps hours old. They did the only thing they knew to do, bring her to their jaja (grandmother). This grandmother cut off the umbilical cord, tying it with a string and then took her to the police. The police called the probation officer in that area…who called a friend of ours named Robin, who lives in Entebbe. Robin was asked to care for this little one until further notice. (FYI, Robin runs a baby home for malnourished children…and then some). And so Kate’s story begins…

However, to share her story, you must know a little bit more about ours. Before moving to Uganda, numerous people would ask, even speculate, if we would adopt again. Our response always went something like this- “If God calls us to adopt again, we will.” The good thing was, we were both on the same page. Or so I thought…

For me, open meant- full throttle, wide-open, strong possibility. It was almost as if it were a matter of who, when and how, rather than if. So, it was no surprise that weeks of living here I was driving myself crazy wondering if this child could be the one or possibility that one. First we met Mable, was she to be ours? She even asked to live with us and I believe her father would have consented. Then there was Esther, Sophie, Shadya, Amorie and Sharon. Just to name a few, all with stories and needs.

As for my husband, open meant if God drops a child on our porch we’d be all in. So, he waited for the doorbell to ring, or in our case, a knock. But thus far, no one had left a child. Later on, we will have come to realize that our definition of “open” looked very different.

Which takes me back to Kate’s story:

It’s mid October, and our daughter Amy and I are talking on the phone. She informs me that she had finished a writing assignment for school. Instead of writing a historical narrative of the life of Leah in the Bible, she writes a romantic narrative. The story was brilliant. After hearing it a light bulb went on for me. Why didn’t we name our children some of those names…a connection to the Bible, not the Dukes of Hazard. From that day forward, I said if we were to have children their names would be Judah, Levi and Ruby (because I don’t care for Reuben much). Strong names…fun correlation.

It’s now Sunday, November 13, 2011, and I am sitting at the Serena Hotel near Lake Victoria celebrating my birthday with my precious family and our dear friends, the Gaedes. Judith, their oldest daughter is there with her gorgeous baby named Elijah. Somewhere in the midst of my celebration day, I mention what I would really like for my birthday was a baby. Ha! However, I was truly joking. Let’s be honest there is a plethora of reasons why we shouldn’t adopt a baby. Top of the list: We are too old or at least will be by the time she is in college. Plus, our stage of life right now is pretty darn sweet, even a bit easy, with all of our kids very self-sufficient. And lastly, we have plenty of children to love on at Cherish, 45 to be exact. And BTW, life is pretty full.

Then something ever so slightly happened, later that afternoon. While Brent is holding Elijah, I have this fleeting and strong thought pattern. It went from admiring his strong hands, which represent the strength of his godly character; to musings about what a great dad he is and that more children need the love of this father! Where did that train of thought come from?

Fast-forward a few hours later, we are sitting at The Boma having an amazing dinner. The mood is right, the food AWEsome and my family is making my day special. I hear my phone ring indicating I have a text. My friend Robin informs me she is in the process of bringing a new baby girl into her home. She is days old and was found in a………..swamp by some boys passing by her on their way to school. I tell her she should call the baby Ruby and could we come see her to say, “Goodbye”. We were days away from leaving to go home to the states for the holidays. Robin said to come on over…

(Side note: even the connection of how Robin gets connected to this little baby girl is so random. The probation officer who ended up with Kate helped Robin get legal guardianship of her girls 7 years prior. Years have passed and Robin needed to reconnect regarding some paperwork for her own girls. The timing was impeccable. If these two had not met at such a time as this…chances are we would never have our daughter.)

Our family wrapped up dinner and headed over to meet this baby. The power was out (as usual) and the house was dimly lit with candles. The room was full. As Kate was placed in my arms I could hardly believe the beauty of this angel. Days before she was left to die, and now, she finds her way to this home…and my arms. God, You have serious plans for this precious child. As I examine her more closely, I notice freckles sprinkled all over her face, arms and even shoulders. I did not know such skin could freckle! Actually, no Ugandan I have met had ever seen it either. Instantly, I think, “Baby, you have freckles like your mom.” Meaning me, of course. At one point, she opens up her eyes wide, looks at me and smiles wide this AWEsome grin. Many would say it is gas…I knew it was a smiling of a different kind. I remember at one point I jokingly ask about naming her Ruby- again. Robin and her boyfriend, David look at each other. They said when my text came in asking about the name, they looked at each other, thinking that is weird. You see, David has spoken to his sister in the UK sharing of Kate’s story. His sister mentioned naming her either Eva or Ruby. Personally, I do not know a Ruby and when I asked my friends is it is a common name in the UK, they too, said we’ve not met one with that name. Strange…we all felt like the name correlation was interesting.

Since, the rest of my family was sick with colds, they wanted to go home. Our visit was short but sweet. Personally, I could have stayed all night. What if this baby was to be ours?

Upon leaving Robin’s, not even 10 seconds outside of the gate I ask Brent what he thinks about this baby. He replied, “I would take her home tonight if we could.” What?! It was then I knew even deeper God was doing a work.

This next bit of information will confirm how I/we knew…on Friday, November 11, 2011 (11-11-11), two days before we even met Kate. Brent is at a Willow Creek conference (via DVD’s) here in Uganda. For days he is listening to messages surrounding leadership. At the end of the conference, Bill Hybels, closes with a powerful message on Jeremiah.  Bill then asks a question, “What is something hard in your life that God is asking you to do and that you have been fighting him on?” In line with his message, when the audience came in that day they were given a piece of broken clay. The assignment went something like this: if God is reveling something to you, surrender it and tell Him you are in- all in. Then, as a symbol of your commitment and a remberance of it, write it down and put the date on the clay. Brent shares the first thing that came to mind was being open about adoption. God convicted my husband by saying this: “While you say you are open, you are really not.” That evening, Brent tells me of the day, especially the events of the last session. I was shocked. “I thought we were both on the same page.” My next thought was “Really? Of all the hard things God is asking us to do, you hear adoption? Lord, what are you doing?”

Well, God was weaving our story and Kate’s story together. For the date of God’s nudging to Brent was the day Kate was born, perhaps even the hour. It was the day she was rescued by those boys…and it would be two days later on my birthday we would meet our soon to be daughter.

A few days pass and Kate is still on my mind…we meet Robin and David for lunch and they bring her. Either Brent or I hold her the entire time. It felt so right. Such peace. But really, Lord? Is this our child? Are we her best? Within days, our family leaves to go “home” for the holidays.

While in the states, we keep this journey private. Just our immediate family knows…feeling God wanting us to seek Him only. We spend days, which turn into weeks praying and talking. The circle widens on who we tell…as the sense we are to pursue adoption increases. We ask for prayer and right before Christmas feel affirmed we are to move forward. And so we do…

We arrive back in Uganda, spend time with Kate and began the process to foster her. The probation officer gives us the paperwork to have her in our home. Once we have that process complete, we will file for legal guardianship and then adoption.

On January 25, we were able to bring our daughter home. Our family will never be the same. This angel (in Luganda angel is Malaika, which was her name before we changed it) has brought a life to our home and joy to us beyond description. Kate has more personality at 2 months than I have ever seen in any baby. She talks, laughs and is so alert. Yesterday, Kate turned 3 months. And every day we celebrate the life God gave her and the gift He gave us in this precious little lady. People often say “Thank you for caring” or “She is such a blessed little girl” and we always respond how thankful we are that God chose us…and how blessed we are to have her in our life. And so our story continues…now meshed with Kate’s…

Side note: Many of you may be wondering way we did not keep the name Ruby. Good question. A few of us in our family LOVED it mainly because how God wove it from the beginning. Some of our children boycotted Ruby because it sounded like, well………a prostitutes name. They even polled their friends and many agreed. Still we (okay I) liked the name. Then one day, I felt strong we needed to land on a name. I had also liked the name Kate. We narrowed it down to Ruby and Kate, very split on which to go. I had been in Proverbs 16 and read verse 33 “The lot is cast into the lap, but its every decision is from the LORD.” Brent and I had talked about casting lots and the way in which it was done and why. In our marriage, we had done so on an occasion or two. We felt led this was to be another time. Our children agreed. We took out a quarter and marked in sharpie a “K” on one side and an “R” on another. We held hands and prayed that God would decide for us. Next, Bo, our first-born, tossed the coin into the air and dropped it. Do over! He did it again with grace and caught it on the back of his hand. The letter K was face up…and so she is named Kate. Her full name is Kate Kenzie Malaika Phillips.

Kate-

Oh, how your entry into this world was such a whirl
Full of pain, abandonment, and helplessness…loneliness

Born to a mom who cared
But for some reason was scared
And saw the swamp as a way out.

Was your story a bit like baby Moses
Did your mom take you to a location where surely you would be found
For just days before, another little baby girl was found in a pit latrine
And sadly her story has ended, and heaven embraced her return

In case there is ever a day you feel, like you were unwanted, unloved, forgotten
Let me tell you the truth of all truths
While we may never know your details,
We know that we know, your Creator knew you, formed you, protected you and gave you to us

It was God, your Father who sent those boys to rescue you
And His timing perfect on many levels.
Your story, our story so powerful
You are such a gift and one we will spend a lifetime to unwrap
You have made our family complete…we love, cherish, and adore you

Kate, you are beautiful!
We love you deeply
We promise to walk life’s journey with you
You are surrounded by such a great crowd of witnesses
Always remember, our child, love God and love people and you will go far.
It’s about the journey…so journey on, my daughter.

We’re all in…Kate.

Desperate

Desperate.
That is what I began to pray.

When coming to serve in Uganda, we were asked many times if we felt we would adopt again. Our response would always be, “Sure, if God leads us to do so.” Then this tag line would often follow, “We would not seek it out, and it would be something that would seek us out.” So, we have been open, watching, and yet content with the family God has given us thus far.

Months ago, we met a fellow Texan named Robin. She runs a babies home, where malnourished children come to get rehabilitated and then go back to their families or become adopted. One day, we went to visit Robin and her babies. (For those of you who don’t’ know this, I (Leah) am a baby fanatic. I LOVE babies) so…on that day I was in my element, sitting around chatting with others, all the while holding babies. Of course, I fell in love with them all (no joke)…but especially Esther. I left Robin that day asking her to hold Esther for us. Robin did so…however; Brent kept saying, “No, Babe, no.” Now, I had heard that for 18 years before God gave him the green light to adopt Tekle – I didn’t like hearing it then, and I didn’t like hearing it now.

In time, God showed me that my husband was right. (Urgh! Most of the time he is simply spot on.) You see Esther is a healthy, beautiful baby girl. Robin has ten families ready to adopt one such as her. So, after a heart to heart with Jesus, and a releasing of Esther, I was reminded that if we were to adopt it would be one (or two, or three or four) who is desperate. Yes, desperate. The word dropped into my heart as if from Him. “Seek the desperate.” And so I began to pray this prayer: “God, the need is great here. I ask You to bring the desperate into our lives.” Pause: I know what you are thinking – what a silly prayer, Leah Phillips! Isn’t most of Uganda desperate? But God knew the desperate I was asking for – it was for those who did not know where their next meal would come from, who needed a friend, smile or hug, word of encouragement and yes, even a home or family to live with. “You know Lord, those people who need You to send someone to help them, whether they are saying it or feeling it. “

The desperate came. By the way, I had forgotten to tell Brent of my prayer. Oops. But he is used to this kind of thing and very forgiving and on board. Another group that would be affected by the Lord answering this prayer was the rest of our household…finally covered that one too. Ready or not…let the desperate flow forth…

The stories I could tell are AWEsome and so God. One example is a little girl and boy at our school here at Cherish. In January, we opened up Hope Academy to the surrounding village. The criteria to attend our school is those that are, well…desperate. No matter where you attend school in Uganda, you have to pay. Many families are unable to do so because of lack of money and too many children per household. Hope Academy sought out the least of the least of these, did their homework (literally visited every application home) and accepted those least likely able to attend school – Those who are HIV positive, those that are orphans, those that have little to no family to care for them. It has been a beautiful picture of the love of God. Many of our new kiddos are suffering difficulties most of us will never face. Many are Muslim and open to learn about the one true God. It is a true picture of God’s grace. This school is a light to many homes. A brilliant plan Cherish has set up…and living out.

From the first day I met this little girl (8 yr. old), I felt an immediate connection. She is one of those kids who truly captivates you. I will confess whenever I am at school I have sought her out, to give her a hug. We sit near one another every week at chapel and when I pop into the class, immediately, everyone says to her, “Auntie Leah is here to see you.” We embrace and try to communicate.

Then there is this boy in Tekle’s class. Every Tuesday, I go to read and sing some songs with the Baby and Top Class kiddos. (Think preschool and kinder mixed together – fun times). The last few weeks, this little boy is all over me – unsolicited. I try to love on him amongst the mob of children, for he seems needy and he likes me.

Last week, the little girl was sick. I was able to help care for her and found out she has a brother at Hope Academy. She informed me he is 5 years old and is in Tekle’s class. Guess what?…he is the same little boy who keeps seeking me out every Tuesday.

I don’t know their story exactly, only bits and pieces. They are Muslim. Poor. Complete orphans, and living with their jaja (grandmother), who is trying to care for them. I asked the girls teacher to please let me know about her life…and she used the word desperate.

As I have watched God move in miraculous ways, weaving His story in front of my eyes, I stand amazed as His orchestration. I have opened my heart and life to those who are desperate and I have been the one who is so encouraged. I have no clue what the future holds, but I do know who holds the future. I want to continue to be His conduit to provide for the desperate. Many of you are providing for the desperate along with us…as you support us in prayer, words of encouragement, visits, emails, and finances. Will you join me in this prayer…to be the answer to someone crying out to the Lord Most High…and be His tool to meet whatever need is being asked for?

I’ll keep you posted on this brother and sister pair. I know that I know, God has something planned and we stand ready to love however we can…

Amy Jean

This post comes to you with a heavy and a hopeful heart. Today, Amy, our daughter, will head back to the states for school. She will spend her summers here, but will spend nine months at school in Austin every year. To be honest, her seven months here in Africa were very difficult. She struggled greatly, and we found ourselves in multiple conversations asking each other if she should be here or not. It has been so difficult to watch five of us quickly become a part of this culture and the people He had called us here to serve, and then watch one member of the family struggle. People would say things like, “If God calls you, He calls the entire family”, and then we would look at our family and wonder. We would pray and ask God, “What do we do when the place we are sent is killing our daughter’s soul and hardening her heart, yet the rest of the family knows this is where we should be?”

We would look at passages like Luke 14:26-27 and really ask, “Is this what He is talking about?” Do I love Jesus so much that I would send my daughter back home at fifteen while we continue to serve halfway around the world? I know that following Jesus should make our life different than the world around us and I know that following Christ has radical implications, but this radical? Really God?

One of the reasons we came to Africa was because we didn’t want to just be moved by stories about people who do radical things for Jesus. We wanted to respond to Him regardless of the call. We didn’t want to just assume such radical actions are for “extreme” Christians – Jesus freaks. We didn’t want to gauge our morality, and our risk for Jesus by comparing ourselves to others. We didn’t want to say we love Jesus, but have Him be only a part of our life. We didn’t want to give Him just a part of our time, money, thoughts, effort…and family. You get the idea. We didn’t want to be continually concerned about playing it safe, and resisting what He was calling us to. Safe equals protection, comfort, and stability – all good things. But, the problem with safe is you lose the opportunity for risk, for failure, and for redemption. We knew this question of what was best for Amy did not have an easy, or safe, answer, and we fell on our faces before Jesus.

Mark 10:17 (and many other passages) have been key for us since God first brought Africa to our hearts. No different in this situation. The problem with this passage is we (more correctly I) make this passage powerless by saying it is not for everybody, so therefore it is certainly not for me. He was talking to that man about his particular “idols”, not me – passage dismissed. You know, the “What Jesus really means is…” and then we (read, I) adjust scripture to fit our lives… But, if you are a follower of Christ it is possible that God could ask us to give up anything and everything.

So here we sat, feeling like this is what is best for Amy, knowing it would be painful, many won’t understand, some will judge and disagree, yet knowing we had to respond. We had so many good excuses why we shouldn’t send her back, yet we knew we should. So, we decided to release her. There are still details we are working through, like, how does our parenting work from halfway around the globe and this wasn’t in our budget. But we are full of peace and hope. So, we put her on a plane tonight. Tomorrow afternoon her grandparents, uncle, the Smith’s and Kelsey Baird will pick her up in Austin and a new chapter begins. Pray for us & pray for her.

A Bit Crazy Here

Some of you have asked, about the political climate here in light of the recent reports in the news. Politically, things have been a bit insane. The opposition leader, who lost the elections back in February, has been staging “Walk to Work” protests (every Monday and Thursday), protesting the high prices of food and fuel – aiming the blame at the current administration. The current administration then replies with accusations that these protests are hurting our country, not helping. These protests often turn violent, with the police shooting tear gas and live rounds into crowds of people. Roads get blocked with burning tires, protesters throw rocks at cars – many are being injured and people are being killed. You can check out more here (http://www.monitor.co.ug/) if you are interested. We have a pretty good network of information so we are able to avoid the hot spots, or stay at home all together. But the tension is high, many Ugandans are worried about the future and the political temperature feels pretty volatile. Continue to pray for the leadership here and the oppressed people of Uganda.

Generosity

This word won’t go away. God seems to be constantly bringing this idea up to the point we can’t shake it. It all starts about the time you get off the plane here. You quickly realize the divide between “the haves” and “the have-nots” is massive. And the numbers in the have-not camp is substantially larger than the haves. You probably already know where this is going – Yes, we are one of the haves and we now face the question everyday of how we deal with that. We have a responsibility. Jesus is pretty clear about what happens to those who ignore the have-nots. I don’t want to be on the wrong side of that equation. So, what do you do when the needs are greater than you could possibly meet? Who do you be generous to? How much is generous? Is there such thing as too generous? How do you balance the big picture with the immediate need? What about self-sustainability? I am sure it is the same where you live too; it is just seems a bit more prevalent here.

Here is something that makes things a bit weirder… Over the past few months we have met many people like us – ex-pats who have moved to Uganda to be a part of building His kingdom here. These people are great people, who have made great sacrifices to be here and are doing some pretty incredible kingdom work. But, we have also noticed a commonality among them. I know this is a blanket statement and doesn’t apply to everyone, but we have seen it time and time again and it has brought some confusion. It goes something like this: You sit down to a meal with these good people. The food is enjoyable, the conversation sweet, and then the bill comes. We split the bill and then the discussion about the tip ensues. It almost always goes like this, “Oh, don’t give anymore than $1. It isn’t expected here and if you give more you will ruin it for the other mzungu’s (white people).” You have these people who are doing amazing things in the name of Jesus during the day, then in the evening share a meal and talk about these God AWEsome things; then this happens. Whether it is how much (or little) they pay their house staff, or how far they grind down the shopkeeper with their negotiations over a $5 pair of sunglasses, something just doesn’t compute for us. I am not saying we have this figured out, but aren’t we supposed to be as generous as we possibly can? Are we just ignorant and not understanding the economics of it all? So, many questions to seek God on…

If you can’t tell, I am just typing out loud with you. We are trying to figure out how to live a generous life without giving away all of our time and money in one day and have nothing left. Or the opposite way of living, not giving away anything at all in the name of security, or “They won’t respect me if I don’t negotiate”, or, “They might use what I give them for something bad.”, or whatever other excuse we have either made or heard. So, the only thing I know is to see what scripture says. Not in some pompous, I am more spiritual than you, “Let’s look to see what Jesus has to say about this!” kind of way. But a real true, from the heart and gut, I need to know what God has to say about this because I don’t want to get this wrong. Have you read Matthew 25? Read it…Right now. Go ahead, I will wait. Isn’t that powerful and frightening? This is a significant issue for anyone who claims to be a follower of Jesus.

In Philippians, Paul is thanking the church in Philippi for the gifts (money) that he has received from them. He then goes on to say that he has more than enough and he is “amply supplied” and encourages them with the truth that God will meet all of their needs. The whole of chapter four is really about provision – about God providing all we need. And if that is true, (and I don’t think I am being idealistic) then isn’t it OK to go all in and bet it all on being generous with the people around us? Do I really believe that He will provide, or do I not? I think we all want to be one of the ones God uses to meet the needs of the hurting world around us. And I am not just talking money, but also time, effort, energy, prayer and a whole host of other things. So, what will it take for us to believe what Paul is saying? What will it take for us to not just say that God will meet our needs, but really live like He will?

Living in a developing country has shown us the middle-class Jesus our culture has created. We have focused on providing for our children. We are obviously supposed to provide for them, but we have made it all about that. We think we are the ones that need to do all of the providing. It is God who does the providing, but we have a responsibility to steward it well. One friend of ours wrote this week about this very topic. He challenged us in being generous and being good stewards. (By the way, it was this friend, who in the beginning challenged us and launched us to think generously. Thanks Tommy!) His point is to be good stewards. Go ahead and pay more for fair trade coffee, because you know what your extra money goes too. He also reminded us of the value of a good bargain, so you can take the extra money you save and take care of others, particulary those we are unable to care for themselves (orphans, children, sick, etc).

Take a look at Psalm 37:25-26: I was young and now I am old, yet I have never seen the righteous forsaken or their children begging for bread. They are always generous and lend freely; their children will be a blessing.

I don’t know about you, but I want that to be me. I want to never be forsaken, or forgotten, I don’t want my children begging for bread, I want my children to be a blessing, and to be blessed, and those things can’t happen until I start living a righteous and generous life and trusting God to be my (our) provider. I hope you can tell we don’t have this figured out. We are struggling through what this means in our context. I do know this though, Jesus was not middle-class – He was a crazy man and I am nowhere near crazy enough.

I ran across this quote somewhere, but unfortunately I didn’t document it very well. I apologize to the author, but it is powerful so I am giving it to you unnoted: “Christ knew that thousands would trample his blood under their feet; that most would despise it; that many would make it an excuse for sinning more; yet he gave his own blood. If I would be like Christ, give much, give often, give freely, to the vile and poor, the thankless and the undeserving. Christ is glorious and happy and so will you be. It is more blessed to give than to receive.”

Oh yeah, one more thing, I doubt any of the people I referred to at the beginning of this post will read this, but if you are them, and you feel your blood pressure rising, I hope this leads to some good conversations as opposed to anger and you not inviting us to dinner anymore. I know I have much to learn from you and your walk and hopefully you feel the same about us and ours.