The Beginning of Kate’s Story…
From the beginning of time I was told I was found under a rock. It was a joke of course, but one that perplexed me as a young child. However, as I grew into adulthood, I knew this was an impossibility to be birthed into a family in such a way…right? Well, since living in Uganda, crazier stories have held true. For instance, quite frequently we hear stories of newborns being found in trash dumps, pit latrines and even in a swamp. Such stories are tragic…heart-wrenching…and miraculous when the abandoned children actually survive.
Months ago, we received word of such a baby being found in a swamp. I remember my very first thought was “How could this be? What possessed this babies mother to do such a thing?” What was meant for bad, God turned into good. The following is one baby’s story of how she was rescued.
One day, some boys were walking by a swamp on their way to school and found a newborn baby girl, perhaps hours old. They did the only thing they knew to do, bring her to their jaja (grandmother). This grandmother cut off the umbilical cord, tying it with a string and then took her to the police. The police called the probation officer in that area…who called a friend of ours named Robin, who lives in Entebbe. Robin was asked to care for this little one until further notice. (FYI, Robin runs a baby home for malnourished children…and then some). And so Kate’s story begins…
However, to share her story, you must know a little bit more about ours. Before moving to Uganda, numerous people would ask, even speculate, if we would adopt again. Our response always went something like this- “If God calls us to adopt again, we will.” The good thing was, we were both on the same page. Or so I thought…
For me, open meant- full throttle, wide-open, strong possibility. It was almost as if it were a matter of who, when and how, rather than if. So, it was no surprise that weeks of living here I was driving myself crazy wondering if this child could be the one or possibility that one. First we met Mable, was she to be ours? She even asked to live with us and I believe her father would have consented. Then there was Esther, Sophie, Shadya, Amorie and Sharon. Just to name a few, all with stories and needs.
As for my husband, open meant if God drops a child on our porch we’d be all in. So, he waited for the doorbell to ring, or in our case, a knock. But thus far, no one had left a child. Later on, we will have come to realize that our definition of “open” looked very different.
Which takes me back to Kate’s story:
It’s mid October, and our daughter Amy and I are talking on the phone. She informs me that she had finished a writing assignment for school. Instead of writing a historical narrative of the life of Leah in the Bible, she writes a romantic narrative. The story was brilliant. After hearing it a light bulb went on for me. Why didn’t we name our children some of those names…a connection to the Bible, not the Dukes of Hazard. From that day forward, I said if we were to have children their names would be Judah, Levi and Ruby (because I don’t care for Reuben much). Strong names…fun correlation.
It’s now Sunday, November 13, 2011, and I am sitting at the Serena Hotel near Lake Victoria celebrating my birthday with my precious family and our dear friends, the Gaedes. Judith, their oldest daughter is there with her gorgeous baby named Elijah. Somewhere in the midst of my celebration day, I mention what I would really like for my birthday was a baby. Ha! However, I was truly joking. Let’s be honest there is a plethora of reasons why we shouldn’t adopt a baby. Top of the list: We are too old or at least will be by the time she is in college. Plus, our stage of life right now is pretty darn sweet, even a bit easy, with all of our kids very self-sufficient. And lastly, we have plenty of children to love on at Cherish, 45 to be exact. And BTW, life is pretty full.
Then something ever so slightly happened, later that afternoon. While Brent is holding Elijah, I have this fleeting and strong thought pattern. It went from admiring his strong hands, which represent the strength of his godly character; to musings about what a great dad he is and that more children need the love of this father! Where did that train of thought come from?
Fast-forward a few hours later, we are sitting at The Boma having an amazing dinner. The mood is right, the food AWEsome and my family is making my day special. I hear my phone ring indicating I have a text. My friend Robin informs me she is in the process of bringing a new baby girl into her home. She is days old and was found in a………..swamp by some boys passing by her on their way to school. I tell her she should call the baby Ruby and could we come see her to say, “Goodbye”. We were days away from leaving to go home to the states for the holidays. Robin said to come on over…
(Side note: even the connection of how Robin gets connected to this little baby girl is so random. The probation officer who ended up with Kate helped Robin get legal guardianship of her girls 7 years prior. Years have passed and Robin needed to reconnect regarding some paperwork for her own girls. The timing was impeccable. If these two had not met at such a time as this…chances are we would never have our daughter.)
Our family wrapped up dinner and headed over to meet this baby. The power was out (as usual) and the house was dimly lit with candles. The room was full. As Kate was placed in my arms I could hardly believe the beauty of this angel. Days before she was left to die, and now, she finds her way to this home…and my arms. God, You have serious plans for this precious child. As I examine her more closely, I notice freckles sprinkled all over her face, arms and even shoulders. I did not know such skin could freckle! Actually, no Ugandan I have met had ever seen it either. Instantly, I think, “Baby, you have freckles like your mom.” Meaning me, of course. At one point, she opens up her eyes wide, looks at me and smiles wide this AWEsome grin. Many would say it is gas…I knew it was a smiling of a different kind. I remember at one point I jokingly ask about naming her Ruby- again. Robin and her boyfriend, David look at each other. They said when my text came in asking about the name, they looked at each other, thinking that is weird. You see, David has spoken to his sister in the UK sharing of Kate’s story. His sister mentioned naming her either Eva or Ruby. Personally, I do not know a Ruby and when I asked my friends is it is a common name in the UK, they too, said we’ve not met one with that name. Strange…we all felt like the name correlation was interesting.
Since, the rest of my family was sick with colds, they wanted to go home. Our visit was short but sweet. Personally, I could have stayed all night. What if this baby was to be ours?
Upon leaving Robin’s, not even 10 seconds outside of the gate I ask Brent what he thinks about this baby. He replied, “I would take her home tonight if we could.” What?! It was then I knew even deeper God was doing a work.
This next bit of information will confirm how I/we knew…on Friday, November 11, 2011 (11-11-11), two days before we even met Kate. Brent is at a Willow Creek conference (via DVD’s) here in Uganda. For days he is listening to messages surrounding leadership. At the end of the conference, Bill Hybels, closes with a powerful message on Jeremiah. Bill then asks a question, “What is something hard in your life that God is asking you to do and that you have been fighting him on?” In line with his message, when the audience came in that day they were given a piece of broken clay. The assignment went something like this: if God is reveling something to you, surrender it and tell Him you are in- all in. Then, as a symbol of your commitment and a remberance of it, write it down and put the date on the clay. Brent shares the first thing that came to mind was being open about adoption. God convicted my husband by saying this: “While you say you are open, you are really not.” That evening, Brent tells me of the day, especially the events of the last session. I was shocked. “I thought we were both on the same page.” My next thought was “Really? Of all the hard things God is asking us to do, you hear adoption? Lord, what are you doing?”
Well, God was weaving our story and Kate’s story together. For the date of God’s nudging to Brent was the day Kate was born, perhaps even the hour. It was the day she was rescued by those boys…and it would be two days later on my birthday we would meet our soon to be daughter.
A few days pass and Kate is still on my mind…we meet Robin and David for lunch and they bring her. Either Brent or I hold her the entire time. It felt so right. Such peace. But really, Lord? Is this our child? Are we her best? Within days, our family leaves to go “home” for the holidays.
While in the states, we keep this journey private. Just our immediate family knows…feeling God wanting us to seek Him only. We spend days, which turn into weeks praying and talking. The circle widens on who we tell…as the sense we are to pursue adoption increases. We ask for prayer and right before Christmas feel affirmed we are to move forward. And so we do…
We arrive back in Uganda, spend time with Kate and began the process to foster her. The probation officer gives us the paperwork to have her in our home. Once we have that process complete, we will file for legal guardianship and then adoption.
On January 25, we were able to bring our daughter home. Our family will never be the same. This angel (in Luganda angel is Malaika, which was her name before we changed it) has brought a life to our home and joy to us beyond description. Kate has more personality at 2 months than I have ever seen in any baby. She talks, laughs and is so alert. Yesterday, Kate turned 3 months. And every day we celebrate the life God gave her and the gift He gave us in this precious little lady. People often say “Thank you for caring” or “She is such a blessed little girl” and we always respond how thankful we are that God chose us…and how blessed we are to have her in our life. And so our story continues…now meshed with Kate’s…
Side note: Many of you may be wondering way we did not keep the name Ruby. Good question. A few of us in our family LOVED it mainly because how God wove it from the beginning. Some of our children boycotted Ruby because it sounded like, well………a prostitutes name. They even polled their friends and many agreed. Still we (okay I) liked the name. Then one day, I felt strong we needed to land on a name. I had also liked the name Kate. We narrowed it down to Ruby and Kate, very split on which to go. I had been in Proverbs 16 and read verse 33 “The lot is cast into the lap, but its every decision is from the LORD.” Brent and I had talked about casting lots and the way in which it was done and why. In our marriage, we had done so on an occasion or two. We felt led this was to be another time. Our children agreed. We took out a quarter and marked in sharpie a “K” on one side and an “R” on another. We held hands and prayed that God would decide for us. Next, Bo, our first-born, tossed the coin into the air and dropped it. Do over! He did it again with grace and caught it on the back of his hand. The letter K was face up…and so she is named Kate. Her full name is Kate Kenzie Malaika Phillips.
Kate-
Oh, how your entry into this world was such a whirl
Full of pain, abandonment, and helplessness…loneliness
Born to a mom who cared
But for some reason was scared
And saw the swamp as a way out.
Was your story a bit like baby Moses
Did your mom take you to a location where surely you would be found
For just days before, another little baby girl was found in a pit latrine
And sadly her story has ended, and heaven embraced her return
In case there is ever a day you feel, like you were unwanted, unloved, forgotten
Let me tell you the truth of all truths
While we may never know your details,
We know that we know, your Creator knew you, formed you, protected you and gave you to us
It was God, your Father who sent those boys to rescue you
And His timing perfect on many levels.
Your story, our story so powerful
You are such a gift and one we will spend a lifetime to unwrap
You have made our family complete…we love, cherish, and adore you
Kate, you are beautiful!
We love you deeply
We promise to walk life’s journey with you
You are surrounded by such a great crowd of witnesses
Always remember, our child, love God and love people and you will go far.
It’s about the journey…so journey on, my daughter.
We’re all in…Kate.
3 comments
Beautiful in all things Jesus. Kate’s life has already encouraged me:) Daughter of the King of Kings and my sister in Christ Jesus! Ephesians 1:3-6 My family just got blessed, thank you Jesus!! Peace*Grace ~Love Y’all, Brian xoxo
Just read this aloud to my mother in law and we are both crying tears of joy for God’s perfect timing.
Just read this aloud to my mother in law and we are both crying tears of joy for God’s perfect timing.